I Hate Tadolf Swiftler (video)

Amber Dorrian, I. Rony,  and Ashley Wells, Wisdom Quarterly

Mr. Hitler enjoying nice dinner party conversation (Hugo Jaeger/TIME/Getty Images)

 

Acting chops on Saturday Night Live

Tadolf isn't so bad. But Swiftler I cannot abide, as Jiminy Glick might put it, and I think he would agree, what with her smug poses, pretentious relationships, and overblown shows.

  

How long will the world stand idly by as she promotes her Naziesque patterns of behavior inducing teens to pout and break up with their boyfriends just to sing along with her ditties?

  

There's nothing like a really big show.

Speaking of ditties, Have you seen her ditties? She has none. She's a flat one-note ham who, apparently, is never-never-ever getting back together with 18-year-old Taylor Lautner or that poor Kennedy boy who hasn't yet read the writing on the wall to know what's coming. (Start milking your 15 minutes the way she is, Conor).
 

    

Tadolf Swiftler (morphthing.com)

Hooray, she dates young. Maybe she's a vampire on a quest to do some K-Stew damage, maybe she's an attention-[hooker], maybe she's just pandering to her teeny-bopping target audience?

Meanwhile, in other Hitler-related news, Mr. Shah of Ahmedabad, Gujarat, India, has offended sensibilities and created a lot of free buzz for his fashion boutique. He named his shop "Hitler" dotting his i with a strategic swastika (normally a beloved Indian religious symbol seen on many entrances, but in this case he used the corporate Nazi symbol).  It worked.

  

Shah claims "Hitler" refers to his strict uncle.

A vocal minority was offended, and Shah is willing to accept a trivial 150,000 rupees ($2,700) to withdraw the name and related launch materials. But he'll be keeping all the free publicity created in the process.

  

This is clearly a case of highway robbery; I had the same idea for Bridezilla's shop in Manhattan called Eve Brown's, a tribute to the unmarried Eva Braun, with a tailor adjoining tailor shop for grooms called... you guessed it. Now Shah's taken the wind out of my flowing gowns.

Exhibit A at the "Anti-I-Heart-T.S." trial to come

But I'm America's sweetheart!

Real fascists (literally, those who marry corporate and governmental power) hold conventions, offer cake and parades, and no one says a word about what is happening. Who questions the Tweedle Dee/Tweedle Dum system forced on us? Did no one notice what happened to Republican candidate and former third-party advocate Ron Paul? He was drummed right out and denied a voice at the GOP ("Grand Old Party") convention.
 

In our Reds vs. Blues -- Bloods vs. Crips -- world, Pres. Obama is no better. He is in some ways worse for being a wolf in sheep's clothing pushing through the most draconian Bush era policies a Pres. Dick Cheney could never have gotten passed without soldiers on the streets. It's no wonder Democrats get blamed. What's the only "legitimate" alternative proposed for voters?
   
Republican racism and sexism? We do not even get the token gesture of marking "None of the Above" on our ballots or the ability to leave our chads hanging. It's a false dichotomy because BOTH parties are flipsides of the SAME coin, the moderate and extreme wings of the Republican party. Go Green. Go Libertarian. Go Anarchist. Anything would be better than following the next Hitler the Diebold/Sequoia/ES+S corporations are told to "elect".

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