Detachment and Compassion in Buddhism

Elizabeth J. Harris,* Detachment and Compassion in Early Buddhism; Wisdom Quarterly

Wisdom Quarterly: Think detachment and non-clingy compassion go together?

 

Bodhi leaf hearts (Gabrielgs)

To people looking at Buddhism through the medium of English, the practice of compassion and detachment can appear incompatible, especially for those who consider themselves to be socially and politically engaged. 

 

In contemporary usage, compassion brings to mind outward-moving concern for others, while detachment suggests aloofness and withdrawal from the world.

• What is compassion, what is wisdom?

Yet Buddhism recommends BOTH as admirable and necessary qualities to be cultivated. This raises questions such as:

• If compassion means to relieve suffering in a positive way, and detachment to remain aloof from the world, how can the two be practiced together?
• Does detachment in Buddhism imply lack of concern for humanity?
• Is the concept of compassion in Buddhism too passive, connected only with the inward-looking eye of meditation, or can it create real change in society?

Kwan Yin (Avalokita), bodhsattva of compassion, Kayosan, Japan (Massimiliano Troiani)

 

It is certainly possible to draw sentences from Buddhist writers which seem to support a rejection of outward concern for others. For example, [classic Mahayana translator] Edward Conze has written, "The Yogin can only come into contact with the unconditioned when he brushes aside anything which is conditioned" (Buddhist Thought in India, 1960, Ch.5).

Similarly, G.S.P. Misra writes (Development of Buddhist Ethics, p. 44), "In the final analysis, all actions [karma] are to be put to cessation... The Buddha speaks of happiness involved in non-action which he further says is an integral part of the Right Way (samma patipada).

 

Taken in isolation and out of context, these remarks can give the impression that the path to [Sanskrit nirvana, Pali nibbana] implies developing a lack of concern towards everything in samsara. But is this inference sound? I would argue that it is not.

• BOOK: Amazing and Amusing Adventures of SAM and SARA: The Zen of All  Kinds of Stuff!

This is an issue which touches on the whole question of transferring concepts across linguistic barriers, in this case Pali and English. It calls not only for an understanding of how the concepts are used within the framework of the Pali Buddhist texts, but also for an awareness of how the English terms used in translation function and whether they are adequate.

 

Inevitably, a dialogical approach between two linguistic frameworks is necessary.

 

Detachment

Laugh more, stay cool (zazzle.com)

Viveka [withdrawal] and viraga [dispassion, cooling] are the two Pali words which have been translated as "detachment." The two, however, are not synonymous. The primary meaning of viveka is separation, aloofness, seclusion. Often physical withdrawal is implied. The later commentarial tradition, however, identifies three forms of viveka: physical withdrawal (kaya-viveka), mental withdrawal (citta-viveka), and withdrawal from the roots of suffering (upadhi-viveka).

Physical withdrawal, as a chosen way of life, was not uncommon during the time of the Buddha. To withdraw from the household life, renounce possessions, and adopt a solitary mendicancy was a recognized path. 

 

The formation of the Buddhist monastic Order (Sangha) was grounded in the belief that going out from home to homelessness could aid concentrated spiritual effort. 

Yet, to equate the renunciation which the Buddha encouraged with a physical withdrawal, which either punished the body or completely rejected human contact would be a mistake. More

• ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Dr. Harris studied Buddhism in Sri Lanka from 1986-1993 obtaining a Ph.D. from the Postgraduate Institute of Pali and Buddhist Studies, Univ. of Kelaniya. She is now Secretary for Inter-faith Relations in The Methodist Church in London. Previous BPS publications include Violence and Disruption in Society (Wheel No. 392/393) and Journey into Buddhism (Bodhi Leaves No. 134).

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What is compassion, what is wisdom?

Ven. Dhammika (Buddhanet.net); edited by Dhr. Seven, Wisdom Quarterly

The Buddha's eyes of wisdom, Maitreya, Thiksey Monastery, Ladakh, India (dailymail.co.uk)

I often hear Buddhists talk about wisdom and compassion. What do these two terms mean?

Some religions believe that compassion or love (the two are very similar) is the most important spiritual quality, but they fail to develop any wisdom.

The result may be ending up a good-hearted fool, a very kind person with little or no understanding.

Other systems of thought, like science, believe that wisdom can best be developed when all emotions, including compassion, are kept out of the way. The outcome of this is that science has tended to become preoccupied with cold results and has forgotten that science should serve not destroy us or make corporations rich. It is out of greed for money, not hate, that scientists lend their skills to developing nuclear waste, bombs, germ warfare, plastic xenoestrogens, and the like.

 

Religion sees reason and wisdom as the enemy of emotions like love and faith. Science sees emotions like love and faith as enemies of reason and objectivity. Science progresses, religion declines.

Buddhism, on the other hand, teaches that to be a balanced and complete individual, we must develop both wisdom and compassion. This is the highest wisdom; this is the greatest compassion. It is not dogmatic. Buddhism bases this on actual experience. Buddhism has nothing to fear from science.

 

According to Buddhism, what is wisdom?

Sensual-pleasure is low, jhana is high (H-K-D)

The highest wisdom is seeing that in reality all phenomena are incomplete, impermanent, and not self. This understanding totally frees our hearts and leads to the great security and happiness called nirvana. However, the Buddha doesn't speak too much about this level of wisdom. It is not wisdom if we simply "believe" what we are told. Real wisdom is something to directly see and understand.

At an ordinary level, then, wisdom is to keep an open mind rather than being closed-minded, listening to other points of view rather than being bigoted, carefully examining facts that contradict our beliefs rather than burying our heads in the sand, being objective rather than prejudiced, taking time to form opinions and beliefs rather than accepting the first or most emotional thing that is offered to us, and it means remaining flexible and strong rather than stiff and brittle about what we believe.

We are wise to be ready to change our beliefs when facts that contradict them are presented to us. The Buddha's advice to the Kalama people was not to believe nothing. It was to investigate and see for oneself so that what one believes agrees with one's own experience.

A person who does this is certainly wise and is certain to eventually arrive at higher (liberating) understanding. The path of just believing what we are told would be silly and easy. The Buddha's PATH is a practice that requires courage, patience, flexibility, intelligence, and compassion.

 

So we arrive at compassion. According to Buddhism, what is compassion?

Imperfect translation has heart in the right place (zazzle.com)

Just as wisdom covers the intellectual or comprehending side of our nature, compassion covers the empathic (emotional) or feeling side of our nature.

Like wisdom, compassion is a deeply human quality. Compassion is made up of two words, "co" meaning together and "passion" meaning strong feeling.

And this is what compassion is. When we see someone in distress, we feel their pain as if it were our own -- so naturally we strive to eliminate or reduce their pain. This is compassion (karuna), the active side of love (metta,  loving-kindness, friendliness).

All the best in human beings, all the Buddha-like qualities like sharing, readiness to give comfort, sympathy, unselfishness, concern, and caring -- these are all manifestations of compassion.

Notice that in the compassionate person, care and love toward others originates in care and love for oneself. They are not mutually opposed. It is best to care for other while caring for oneself. They are mutually supportive activities.

(Playing the role of martyr makes two people miserable, ourselves and other. We give rise to pride or resentment. Then if someone helps us, we feel guilt. This is no way to practice compassion).

We can really understand others when we really understand ourselves. We can give to others when we give to ourselves. Selflessness does not mean self-abnegation; it means seeing that things are really impersonal so we can give them up, give up clinging, give up greed, give up selfishness. This is wisdom as it feeds compassion.

We will know what's best for others when we know what's best for ourselves. We can feel for others when we feel for ourselves. So in Buddhism, one's own spiritual development blossoms naturally into concern for the welfare of others.

The Buddha's life illustrates this very well. It was not one of sitting in the Himalayas, as he had done in past lives cultivating absorption (jhana) and developing good qualities, simply withdrawn enjoying the bliss of meditation.

He spent six years struggling for his own welfare, striving to be of benefit to the whole of the human world and the devas.

So you are saying that we are best able to help others after we have helped ourselves. Isn't that a bit selfish?

We usually see altruism, concern for others before oneself, as being the opposite of selfishness, concern for oneself before others. Buddhism does not see it as either one or the other but rather as a blending of the two. 

Genuine self-concern gradually matures into concern for others as one sees that others are really in the same boat, suffering in many of the same ways, not so different from oneself. 

This is genuine compassion, and it is the most beautiful jewel among the many treasures of the Buddha's teachings.

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Buddhist Radio: Anger, Emotions, the Brain

Karla McLaren (Language of Emotions), Dr. Rick Hanson (Enlightened Brain), Roy Tuckman ("Something's Happening," KPFK) and SoundsTrue.com; Wisdom Quarterly

Dharma over the airwaves of LA (Ben Ashmole/flickr.com)

   

Loving is easier than taking a pill (weheartit.com)

Los Angeles is fortunate to have Buddhism on the radio at 90.7 FM. The connected world is fortunate, too, because it streams worldwide.
  
Unfortunately, much of the Buddhist programming occurs overnight. It is radio for night people with Roy of Hollywood on "Something's Happening." Thankfully, it's temporarily available in the audio archives to listen to FREE from Pacifica.  

In an extraordinarily lucid and enlightening segment, Karla McLaren (12:00-1:30 am, Sept. 11, 2012) redefines the usefulness of "negative" emotions. What is anger for? How about sadness, depression, guilt, and worry?
 

Emotions are as integral to our existence as consciousness (kyleweber.com)

   
They all serve us and have something they are trying to tell us. But they speak in a special way. In The Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You, McLaren reveals that society tells us something different: We shouldn't feel them at all, and if we do, we should feel bad about it! Society shoulds all over us, and emotions linger for years unheard and unprocessed. McLaren points out that there's a better way.

• Part 4 of 6: "The Gift of Anger - Healthy Boundaries." Preparing for emotional channeling. Sadness and anger.  Contentment, guilt, and happiness.  Worry and joy.  Heading into deeper water.  Channeling anger.  Fury and rage.  Hatred: Part One.  Hatred: Part Two. 
• PLAY NOW

Does the brain know what the heart is saying?

Not content to deal with the heart, Roy follows up with a brilliant assessment of the brain (1:30-3:30 am). Neuroscientist Rick Hanson, Ph.D., author of The Enlightened Brain: The Neuroscience of Awakening, gets to the root of brain structures and their activity in relation to Session 5 of 6: "Equanimity." What is an equanimous mind? Better still, What is equanimity?
  
Hanson tackles bigger Buddhist questions: The cause of suffering.  How our reactions create unnecessary suffering.  How the brain creates suffering.  The four components of equanimity.  Guided Practice: Focusing on Change.  Interdependence.  Guided reflection on the causes of a present difficulty.  Not being alarmed about being alarmed.  
  
Guided Practice: You're Alright Right Now.  The eight worldly winds.  Guided Practice: Tracking the Feeling Tone of Experiences and Their Reactions.  Calm, contentment, and virtue.  Guided Practice: Opening to a Growing Sense of Contentment.  Serenity. 

• PLAY NOW
• Coming soon: FREE LIVE STREAMING VIDEO EVENT: RICK HANSON "The Compassionate Brain"  October 8, 2012.
• Both authors presented courtesy of Sounds True, (800) 333-9185, soundstrue.com

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Happy for No Reason (audio)

Marci Shimoff with Aurora Winter, griefcoachacademy.com

Marci Shimoff is happy and in love for no reason at all (OmTimes.com)

   

(awarenessmag.com)

How do we raise our current happiness level? Is there a process to open our hearts and dissolve all pain, heartache, and psychological emptiness. 

  

Sometimes we need a fresh approach to deal with the negativity in our mind, in our relationships, and in our environment. What is it? What are the three essential "happiness habits" to live a life of freedom, joy, and ease?

• LISTEN: Happy for No Reason (free for 48 hours)

Aurora Winter, Grief Coach

Marci and Aurora share the latest scientific research on happiness with personal stories and the wisdom of the ages around releasing grief and reclaiming happiness.
  
Enjoy! Aurora Winter is dedicated to everyone's happiness as the founder of the GriefCoachAcademy.com, (866) 344-3108.

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Love Chemistry and finding The One

Spring is for spunk, but summer’s for lovin. Dr. John Sharp, Harvard psychiatrist and the author of The Emotional Calendar: Understanding Seasonal Influences and Milestones to Become Happier, More Fulfilled, and in Control of Your Life, claims it's all about timing. The time of year, that is. Summer months send us in search of The One. For advice on "seasonal dating, mating, and relating," Match.com asked Dr. Sharp for advice on each season’s potential.

Q: Are certain seasons better or worse for finding love?

A: Some people make the mistake of waiting for the most favorable of circumstances to embark on romance; others take whatever works in the moment. I am for the latter strategy -- enhanced, however, by “seasonal awareness.” More

The Chemistry of Love

When sparks fly between two people, we're quick to say they have "chemistry." Not everyone realizes that such couples literally have do have chemistry... More

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Buddhism and Valentines Day.

This year the average American will spend $116 on Valentine's Day, which is a holiday in honor of love. In years past, I have boycotted Valentine's Day because of it's commercialism but this year I have decided to focus on the love aspect while discarding the consumerism that clouds this day dedicated to love. In honor of the true meaning of love, I would like to share several quotes from Buddhist thinkers on the subject. First, it is important to understand what true love is about.

Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh teaches that true love, is love that is given freely and unconditionally without expecting reward in return. Love that hinges upon the other person doing everything we like or want of them is not true love, but rather based on attachment, conditions and control.

But, one can not discuss love and Buddhism without mentioning the Metta Sutta or Sutra, which is claimed to have been spoken by Buddha, himself. I am not going to quote the full sutra here, but if you want to read it in its entirely, then click here:

Let none deceive another, Or despise any being in any state. Let none through anger or ill-will wish harm upon another. Even as a mother protects with her life, her child, her only child, so with a boundless heart should one cherish all living beings: radiating kindness over the entire world spreading upwards to the skies, and downwards to the depths; outwards and unbounded, freed from hatred and ill-will. Whether standing or walking, seated or lying down, free from drowsiness, one should sustain this recollection. This is said to be the sublime abiding. By not holding to fixed views, the pure-hearted one, having clarity of vision, being freed from all sense desires, is not born again into this world.

Many people today look to His Holiness the Dalai Lama for inspiration and wisdom. So, I added a quote from him on the matter of love, it's importance and power:

If there is love, there is hope that one may have real families, real brotherhood, real equanimity, real peace. If the love within your mind is lost and you see other beings as enemies, then no matter how much knowledge or education or material comfort you have, only suffering and confusion will ensue" -His Holiness the Dalai Lama from 'The little book of Buddhism'

It is my hope that you find love today and always. If you do not feel love from others then perhaps it's first important to focus upon loving yourself. It's hard to accept or believe true love when it presents itself to us if we don't accept that we deserve to be loved. And, I want all who read this to know that I deeply love you and care about you all; and hope that this day and many others will find you filled with that love as well.

You are not alone--imagine the world-wide sangha all coming together to acknowledge your worth and importance with a collective hug; feel the compassion and acceptance coursing from our hearts and veins into yours. But, don't forget to pass that love on to someone else!! May you we all soon be free from selfishness, hatred and self-loathing. These are all delusions that keep us from feeling the ever present love that is essential to a life without suffering in this universe.

~Peace to all beings~

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Let us Love One Another.

(Above: The famous "Tank Man" who stood down the might and power of the Chinese army during the Tienanmen Square protests in 1989).

Today I just want to reach out to whomever is reading and share a moment of humanity together.

I want to share today how much I love them. Regardless of political viewpoint, religion or non-religion. We are all human beings that deserve love, respect and tolerance. I call on all of us to make this year a peaceful one--we must stop insulting one another and actually listen to one another. We CAN work together--it has been done before, so we know it is possible. My heart is brimming over with compassion for this wounded but beautiful world--if my arms were big enough I'd give the whole world a hug. We need to let go of our pride and heal one another because we're all each other has on this far-flung planet.

So, what can we do to heal this world? Well, not much on a global scale--we are pretty helpless as individuals toward changing global problems. However, we can affect great change in our own daily lives. These are the moments in grocery store when we can share a smile. Times when we can offer a hug and a patient ear to a friend who just had a bad day. These are things we can do daily--if not multiple times a day. And they make a difference. You may have no idea what sharing a smile with someone might do for their day. Maybe they're cynical about the world but that smile gave them hope that not everyone in the world is a jerk. Or maybe you shared some words of empathy with a depressed person and forgot the incident a day or two later but chances are those words were like giving water to a person parched with thirst from wandering in the desert. It might even save a life.

I can attest first hand to the power of a strangers smile, words of empathy or concern. I sometimes struggle with suicidal depression from having a psychiatric disorder, as many of you know. I can tell you that there were several times when the seemingly smallest thought of kindness gave me the strength to go on and live another day. We just don't have any idea what impact our words and actions will have on someone. So, don't disregard those few minutes of empathy that you shared on the bus with a person struggling. It might not seem it but one word of compassion can start a chain-reaction of interdependent causes that touch countless lives for the better. And that momentum builds, slower, but exponentially until one day we witness societal changes that would seem otherwise to have come from nowhere. Yet they didn't. They were a constant wearing down of hatred, anger and delusion like a seemingly weak trickle of water cracked a giant boulder into two pieces.

We don't have to be the next Nobel Peace Prize winner, a world leader, the Dalai Lama or a celebrity to bring hope, strength and confidence to millions of people. Recall the skinny, lone man who stood a column of tanks down during the Tienanmen Square demonstrations in China? His "small action" inspired countless people to challenge not just unjust authority and power but to challenge their own unjust oppression--around the world and beyond time because I am still being inspired years later in far away America from this man's action in the past. This could be the courage to leave a violent relationship, face our often crippling fears or inspire us to be better people to ourselves and those we interact with.

So, don't doubt yourself the next time you get the urge to show some kindness toward another. Don't blow it off thinking your few words couldn't help much because perhaps not to you in your present moment because you aren't in a state of torment at that time. However, to the person who those words would be directed toward, it could mean the difference between life and death. That is how we save lives. That is how we change the world for the better; sharing the present moment with another person to connect and share our common bond is about as powerful an action we can perform!!

~Peace to all beings~

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Sex, Sin and Zen: A Buddhist Exploration of Sex.

I was honored to review a copy of Brad Warner's new book titled, Sex, Sin and Zen: A Buddhist Exploration of Sex from Celibacy to Polyamory and Everything in Between. I have yet to finish the book but it's a page turner, eye opener and refreshing expose on the confluence of Buddhism and sexuality. As someone who has long had sexual scars from the upbringing of the religion of my youth; I have long contemplated upon how as a Buddhist I should approach sexuality.

Until this book, most of what I have read about Buddhism and sexuality has come from celibate monks and nuns. These monastics are some of the most enlightened people on Earth yet it is still difficult for me to take sexual advice from someone who has probably never known sexuality in much of any form.

The other obstacle I have had difficulty navigating at times when dealing with sexuality and Buddhism is that it is often intertwined with traditional Asian culture, which sometimes makes it confusing for a western Buddhist (and when I say "western Buddhist" I include westerners of Asian backgrounds that might feel they can relate to their western culture sometimes more than their Asian one. Not that all do, or should. I'm just pointing out that not all "western Buddhists" are white). Anyway, It's not that I find Asian culture inferior in the least. It is a beautiful culture that I admire deeply and happily learn from daily. In fact, in many ways I find much of what Asian culture has to offer to be desperately lacking in western societies like here in America.

Still, when it comes to sexuality it was very helpful (for me) to hear it talked about in western terms, with western references to western pop culture--and from someone of my generation, Brad Warner. It's just the culture that I understand most. Please don't think I assume that only westerners understand sexuality because that's not my intention. I'm simply talking about in the way I understand most--keep that in mind. I don't mean to insult someone, so if you find anything in this post offensive; please forgive my ignorance. Something to note from the book, (I'm not dishing out all the saucy stuff here -- you have to buy the book--sorry) Warner is coming from Zen Buddhism, which sometimes is less rigid about sexuality than perhaps some other sects. In addition, it is Zen from Japan, which Warner reminds us often allows monastics to marry. So, keep that context in mind when deciding if to read it or not.

Also, a quick warning to those who might have "virgin ears" (to throw in a pun) when it comes to sexuality. This book doesn't speak about it in medical terms, and thankfully, so to those of us who aren't doctors. Warner, refreshingly, for me, uses modern terminology and examples that permeate the younger generations today. Yes, it is sometimes makes you blush but since when did sexuality become a subject you could address properly without a little sensual feeling? I adore the monks but when I hear them talk about sexuality it's been so denuded (sorry, another pun) that you can hardly tell if what they're addressing is in fact, sex!! It seems that sexuality is one topic that some Buddhists feel is taboo or unimportant. Notice I said, "some" Buddhists--not all, of course see it this way.

This book reminds me of the old, American, book, "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Sex but Were Afraid to Ask" that taught a lot of Americans about sexual intimacy. Except that this is the Zen Buddhist, modern punk version!! Warner addresses everything from "Are Zen Buddhists allowed to masturbate? Are they allowed to look at pornography? Is there wiggle room with celibacy? Or, Sex and Karma, Sex and Suffering, Sex and No-Self. As well as, Zen Dating and Marriage Advice. And even talk about "mindful sex!!" Incidentally, I like Warner's take on mindfulness in this book where he says perhaps a better phrase is "being present" as, "When you say, 'I am mindful of (fill in the blank),' you are already creating separation between you and your activities. True mindfulness is when you let go of the idea of mindfulness and just do whatever it is you happen to be doing" (emphasis added by James).

Warner believes as I do that it isn't the sex itself that's a problem but the clinging to sex. Or becoming so attached to sex that you can't enjoy anything else in life. Too often sex gets thrown out at the same time as the desire for it but sex can be engaged in with total awareness of everyone involved and based on the middle-way. His teacher, Gudo Nishijima Roshi rephrases the third precept as, "Do not desire too much" rather than "Do not misuse sexuality." Bodhidharma, the fifth-century Buddhist monk traditionally cited as the founder of the Zen school, said, "There is nothing to grasp. Not giving rise to attachment is the precept of not misusing sexuality."

The last thing I want to address before leaving you swirling with sex and Zen in your mind is that not all of this book is just about sex. It's so much more than that. It's above all a book of how to enjoy sexuality as a Zen Buddhist and do it with doing the least amount of harm as possible to you and others. This is where Right Intention comes in. If your intention toward sexuality is out of love and not pure selfishness then enjoy!! Buddhism isn't just austerity and reverence after all!! Believe it or not, (after seeing some of the dour, serious and painful faces on some American Buddhists in sanghas) Buddhists do allow for fun and happiness!! If someone tells you that Buddhism is no fun at all and nothing but pain then I might recommend you read Brad Warner's book.

That's all I can say because I want you to get the full barrage of Warner's nod to the sensual side of Zen Buddhist life. To give away any more of the saucy bits would be to ruin the fun!! I highly recommend this book to anyone with a sense of humor, the ability to not take life too seriously and a sincere desire to better understand sexuality in Zen Buddhism. I give it a 9.5 out of 10--one of my favorite contemporary Buddhists books in a long while.

~Peace to all beings~

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How Do Love Your Self if There is No-Self?

Buddha is well known for teaching that there is no such thing as a "self" but something I have struggled with for some time is, "how does self-love fit into that context?" My therapist is trying to help me love myself more because I don't always have the best self-esteem. I believe the Buddha too has taught about the importance of self-love.

So, my dilemma from a Buddhist standpoint is, "how can I "love" my "self" if attaching importance (which love does to a degree) to a sense of, "self" is delusion that causes suffering? That conversation with my doctor brought this to the surface, and I'm fairly perplexed by it. One is always learning on this path, so, I'd love to hear what your ideas are upon this conundrum of mine. I have some pretty wise readers, so I am hopeful that some of you can shed a little light upon my road-block (bowing).

~Peace to all beings~

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Motivations for Becoming Buddhist.

Baseball player Alex Rodriquez is reportedly going to convert to Buddhism for his girl friend, actress Kate Hudson. I'm not a Religious Studies professor but I do know that converting to a religion out of a feeling of obligation or to please a person is a horrible reason. I was apart of a belief system growing up in which I remained for longer than I should have out of a feeling of obligation and It was gut-wrenching. I finally realized that I was living a lie and deceiving my parents into thinking I was a loyal member.

I can't say whether A-Rod will stay with it or not but too often we do things for the wrong reasons and the biggest example I can think of is with love/happiness. We might think that we have to be a certain way in order to gain the love of someone and be happy. The other side of that coin is when we withhold love to get things from someone. That isn't love or true happiness. That is loved based on attachment. It's like saying, "I love you but only if you do the things I like, be the person I want and believe the things I do." The Venerable Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh says of happiness and love in his book, "Teachings on Love":

"Our idea of happiness can prevent us from actually being happy. We fail to see the opportunity for joy that is right in front of us when we are caught in a belief that happiness should take a particular form."

James: It's hard when our vision of happiness doesn't pan out but if we can find happiness in what we already have then we'll never be disappointed. And we won't be manipulating people thus causing suffering for them too. I working on that with everyone else by the way. My pot is no less cracked than anyone else's. I hope that A-Rod finds something about Buddhism to be important, interesting or worthwhile other than being the religion his girlfriend practices. I also hope Kate Hudson didn't pressure him to convert. Because that would make me wonder just how well she knows Buddhism because pressuring people to do much of anything in Buddhism is taboo. I'm not saying that A-Rod doesn't have any personal interest in Buddhism but from what I know of the story it sounds like he is doing it just for her. I hope it works out because I sure have found a lot in Buddhism that has helped my life but it doesn't mean much if you're not fully engaged.

~Peace to all beings~

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Thoughts on Gay Marriage.

The term "traditional marriage" is a modern invention because there has been no such thing as a simple, codified form of marriage throughout history, religion and geography. Besides the examples given in the video, back in Biblical days traditional marriage meant marrying more than one wife. It also meant and still does in some parts of the world that women are chattel and basically auctioned off to the would be husband who has the most goats.

It meant in the medieval period to marry out of status and hope of improving that status rather than out of love. Yet love from another being is what we all yearn for and hope to achieve in this life. Even monks who don't marry express love for the Dharma and the Sangha as well as for the laity. Their marriage is again, not "traditional" but their marriage to the three jewels is no less important and fulfilling.

How twisted have some religious veins become that some people are using them to deny people basic happiness and love in a world that is so full of suffering. Why would we want to cause even more suffering by denying people the right to marry the person that they want to share their life with? Shouldn't we be applauding people who want to commit to honor and cherish each other in this world of hatred, isolation and division? Without love for each other I ask, "What chance do we have as a species?"

~Peace to all beings~

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Intentional Chocolate.

I was recently given a chance to sample some tasty chocolate (dark chocolate even--my favorite) from a company called, "Intentional Chocolate." First let me say that it is some of the best chocolate that I have ever had as it tastes like each piece is homemade by some cook's ancient family recipe. One of the reasons that I think I enjoyed this chocolate so much was because I knew that it was made with loving, caring, compassionate people. From the I.C. website:

Proven through scientific research to heighten well-being, Intentional Chocolate is the first intention-enhanced food on the market. The good intentions are infused into the chocolate from advanced meditators -- some who have trained with the Dalai Lama -- and is delivered with love to those who eat it.

All the products from Intentional Chocolate include this intention: “Whoever consumes this chocolate will manifest optimal health and functioning at physical, emotional and mental levels, and in particular will enjoy an increased sense of energy, vigor and well-being for the benefit of all beings.”

Intentional Chocolate™ donates 50 percent of its net profits to organizations committed to the benefit of humankind, and it assists non-profit organizations in their fundraising efforts by offering them low cost, customized packaging and product development for resale.

While the subtle and powerful relationship between mind and matter has been the subject of scientific inquiry for centuries, only recently have scientists studied the effects of positive thoughts on food. Intentional Chocolate™ and its research partner, the HESA Institute (www.hesainstitute.com) are leaders in the revolutionary new field of intentional nutrition proving that intention embedded into food can positively affect those who consume it.

Research shows that Intentional Chocolate™ significantly decreases stress, increases calmness, and lessens fatigue in those who eat it.

In a double-blind, placebo-controlled study that was published in the scientific peer-reviewed journal, Explore: The Journal of Science and Healing (October 2007) it was found that one ounce of Intentional Chocolate™ per day for three days increased subjects’ well-being, vigor and energy by an average of 67 percent and, in some cases, up to 1,000 percent, when compared to a control group.

Read more about their research. I'm not sure if I believe the idea that meditating over food can make it better for a person but I do know that chocolate (especially chocolate made with pure and concentrated ingredients like Intentional Chocolate) can help relax the body and stimulate the pleasure zones in the brain. It can also energize due to the sugar and small doses of caffeine. I believe though that it does make a difference knowing that someone made the chocolate just for you with joy. Just as like they say on their website that soup made by your mother tastes better than any other!!

In the end, while I remain open to the intentional thoughts making the chocolate more beneficial the main thing is that I highly recommend this chocolate. One taste and you'll understand why I ate all of mine in about two days!! A gift package would be a great gift right before Halloween and the holiday season in general. Now I'm hungry. That chocolate just melts in your mouth and brings a smile to your face. Order some and find out what all the buzz is about!!

~Peace to all beings~

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Chimpanzee Helps Raise Baby Tiger Cubs.

Animals are often seen as dumb and beneath human beings in many societies and religions. The Judeo-Christian-Islamic religions believe that animals are here for man's benefit--man's greed in my opinion. There are many cases of animals saving human beings from a burning house, get help when lost and even cases of them being able to dial the phone for help such as if the owner has a seizure of heart attack!! There are many who think they are incapable of emotions such as love, compassion and concern but there have been numerous cases of the opposite. These animals may not know that they are experiencing emotions but their actions show that they clearly are motivated by some level of emotional motivation. Well animals are also capable and willing to help other animals too. Take the case of the chimpanzee Anjana who has adopted two white tiger cubs as her own when their mother rejected them. She is an expert it seems at these things as she has previously helped raise leopards and lions.“She gives them a bottle and lies with them — she is a great assistant.” The cubs have become almost inseparable from their new motherly figures. She has a close contact and bond and gives them a nurturing.'

James: I wouldn't be surprised if Anjana is reborn as a human being in her next life with her kind, caring, compassionate, loving and nurturing essence. She is already practicing the Dharma. I'm sure that she will be a wonderful human being if she gets that chance. May she be a good example for us humans to keep practicing the Dharma to make the most of this human life.

~Peace to all beings~

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Why I Love My Mother.

I found this picture of my mom and I back when I was younger and skinner. And so I thought that I'd write an ode to her today. She's a sweetheart and one of the nicest, most loving and compassionate persons that I know. She's a hero of mine and one of my best friends.

Throughout all the years that I was living at home she would get up earlier than I and cook me a full breakfast (pancakes, bacon, eggs, juice--the whole works) and her cooking is better than any restaurant food I'd ever eaten (her potato salad is beyond delicious just to name one dish that she makes) And on my birthday she'd make (and still does) all of my favorites.

When I was in primary/elementary school I usually walked home and would pick dandelions (they have a bright yellow flower on top of a long skinny stem but most see them as weeds). Well anyway I use to bring them home to give to my Mom and despite them being sticky and "weeds" she accepted them with so much love and happiness. She would always then fill up a juice glass with water and place the dandelions in it.

And when I would get sick (and still when I get sick) she would always take care of me better than any nurse could. She would buy comfort foods for me that sat well with my body such as my stomach when I'd get the flu. And when my stomach ached or if I had a fever she would hold my hand or place a cool wash cloth on my forehead to calm me down and ease my fever.

Some of my earliest and fondest memories where that she was the first person that I saw after waking up from a nap and was always greeted with a smile and a little snack. I'm getting teary eyed writing this--my heart is full to the brim with love today.

She is also one of the best listeners and that is such a great quality to have because most times we all just want to be heard and understood when we have struggles. She is also one of these people who always knows just what to say at the perfect moments. She is one of the happiest people that I a know and always seems to have a smile on her face. I love how excited and happy she gets when she sees me. She really knows how to make people feel appreciated.

She taught me well the value of respect and tolerance for all people regardless of race, religion, ethnicity, age or sex. And respect is something that is sorely lacking in our modern world. I was rightly taught that I am no more important or less than any other being in this world and that has served me well in life. It helps keep me humbled while at the same time giving me a sense of self-worth.

My mom is also deeply spiritual and helped me cultivate my own sense of spirituality and gave/gives me a peaceful, strong and yet humble example of the essence of spirituality. And while we now follow different religions we are able to find common ground and support each other. And because of our deep spiritual discussions we both came to realize that our two paths are actually quite similar in many ways. Those are just a few of the many reasons why I love my mother dearly and will always do so.

She is one of the most amazing people that I have ever met and cherish each moment that I have to be with her. Thank-you mom for all that you have done for me, do for me and share with me. My life has been greatly sculpted by your influence and it is all for the better. I love her so much and think the world of her. I am so happy that I have this life/chance to enjoy her energy and presence. That being said, I know that her and I have had a deep connection and relationship that goes beyond this lifetime and will always do so. She's a true Bodhisattva. She wants nothing more than for all beings to be happy and loved. If I can live up to her example in this life then I will die a very happy and content man.

---End of Transmission---

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Intolerant Christians.

I recently read another article (see the previous one here) on The Buddhist Channel about predatory practices and bullying by Christians in predominately Buddhist countries.

I don't have the slightest intention to put one religion above another, to praise one and to blame another. I'm here writing about the attitude I'm expecting from somebody claiming to be a religious person, especially if he has much power in voicing his ideas. Then I came across Mr. Lothe's article in the UB POST and I did some small research about what the head of Eagle TV is writing about religions, and how much he cares about truth and mutual understanding – and I felt disturbed to see how he is trying to boast about his religion as being superior. Is this a way to solve the problems humanity is facing?

Mr. Terry is living in a country with a long Buddhist history (Mongolia) and where a majority of the people consider themselves Buddhists. He wrote on March 10, 2008: "Certainly I'm no fan of Buddhism. The teachings of Buddhism cannot hold a candle to the life of Jesus Christ. As I've written previously, Christianity is superior to Buddhism ethically, historically, and factually." Where is the respect?

In a previous article about corruption he wrote: "Mongolian society has primarily been informed by the world views of Atheism and Buddhism; but they don't seem to be able to affect the kind of character in society that makes corruption a source of personal shame. If these world views actually had that ability, then one would expect with such a long history here that corruption's acceptability would not be on the rise. The same is true in other nations primarily informed by these world views." Mr. Terry, December 15 2006 Then he wrote: "…they (Atheism and Buddhism) don't seem to be able to affect the kind of character in society that makes corruption a source of personal shame."

Only one remark: It's true that no religion and philosophical system can prevent people from unethical behavior. Just think about all the Christian priests abusing young boys (this kind of behavior can be found in any religion, unfortunately). And think about all the corrupt and cruel dictators, presidents and prime ministers, claiming to be a follower of their religion – for example Mugabe, being a Catholic.

The attitude of Mr. Terry is getting again very clear when he writes: "If a Mongolian wants to be a Buddhist and openly express his Buddhism, let him." What does this mean if he also wrote: "Christianity is superior to Buddhism ethically, historically, and factually." and "As one former Mongolian Buddhist said to me about why he finally rejected Buddhism in favor of Christ, 'In Buddhism there is no love.' Comparatively speaking, he is correct."

James: To say that there is no love nor ethics in Buddhism is to betray either 1). An extreme ignorance and misunderstanding of Buddhism or 2). A blatant disregard for the truth to disparage a beautiful belief system to manipulate people into following your own twisted version of another belief system. Sure you might get some people to follow Jesus but at what cost? Your zealotry has blinded you to the point of losing your spiritual integrity just to add a few numbers to the ranks for your religion. You are so blinded by your lust to prove everyone else's religion wrong and "save" them that you're willing to go against nearly every major tenet of that very religion you claim is so wonderful. Is it really that worth it?

In the end, who are you really at war with, the Buddhists or your own fears Mr. Terry? Somehow he's threatened by Buddhism and I'm not sure why. Maybe you're threatened that Buddhism doesn't believe in a "God" and that Buddhists seem very happy despite that belief. So maybe that shakes your foundation and forces you to face a profoundly deep fear that maybe there really isn't a "God" and that if such is the case that you wouldn't be able to control your unbridled desires/thoughts? But I'm not a psychologist and I don't really want to rip you away from your beliefs. All I'm asking is to be respectful and let people decide what to believe for themselves. If they want to know more about Christianity then let the come to you, they will if they want to know but please don't tear their families and society apart just to mark another "believer" onto your list. These people aren't numbers, they're people that want and deserve the same kind of respect that you want and deserve yourself Mr. Terry.

When Mr. Terry writes "let him be a Buddhist" it means 'let him be a Buddhist, but let him know that he is not that good as a Christian, and that he's completely mistaken.' This attitude is dividing human beings into higher ones and lower ones, into good ones and wrong ones. I think Jesus would be sad to see what kind of game Mr. Terry is playing – playing the 'competition game' with religion.

James: So what is that makes often makes Christians bullies? I know that every religion has them but there seems to be so many amongst the monotheistic faiths. It seems that the majority of religious strife in the history of the world has been caused by the three main monotheistic religions (Christianity, Judaism and Islam). Again, Buddhism has had its problems with bullying too but for the purposes of this post I just want to understand why the monotheistic ones are so often the most militant. I have my own views besides the ones I mentioned in the post but I'd like to read your views. Any insights?

~Peace to all beings~

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Martin Luther King Jr. Killed 40 Years Ago but the Vision Lives On.

(The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. standing in an office with a picture of Gandhi, his hero on the wall).

Forty years ago today the great race and civil rights peace activist Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated. In that moment there were many in the civil rights movement who feared that Martin's vision of equality amongst all races, religions and ethnic groups would die with him. However, his wave of peaceful, loving energy had planted seeds of hope and change within the hearts of millions just as those same seeds had been planted in his heart from the example of Gandhi.

Just as those seeds grew within his mind, he knew that the fertile seeds of his vision would transfer from one person to the next via the winds of inevitable change to each new generation. He understood the peaceful power of oneness and inter-connection. He understood that with each new generation the seed would grow stronger, the roots would dig deeper and that that the tree would eventually ripen the fruit of his labors and bring about the change needed.

And that tree has indeed grown into a vibrant, strong one that has born much fruit to where today we are on the cusp of the possible election of America's first African-American president.

So while we still have work to do I think that Dr. King would be proud of what we have done with the vision that he left us to fulfill.

May we continue to pass those seeds of equality and tolerance to all those whom we meet along our path.

While we represent different cultural and ethnic branches of humanity may we always remember that we are all still apart of the same vibrant tree.

~Peace to all beings~

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My Interview with Mala Maker Brian McIntyre. Part II

CLICK HERE FOR THE FIRST PART OF MY INTERVIEW WITH BRIAN MCINTYRE:

6). What are a few (2-3) of your favorite books on spirituality? Play of Consciousness! By Swami Muktananda. This will forever stand as the book that clarified my path and make all previous experiences clear and understandable.I am amassing a library of books in hopes that any one of the books will iPmpact their lives as this book has for me.

7). What is your view of the world today?

FEAR brings ignorance and despair. Living in fear forever roots us in samsara and believing that we are separate from one another will never heal the state of the world.The more people can sit in reflection of themselves and realize that we are all related in light and LOVE than the world will be a space of LOVE and devotion. A world where we all live together and help each other realize our own divinity.

8). Your website mentions that incense is available. What is your favorite incense and why? (You can choose two if you’d like).

“Temple Incense” I call it this because I am not sure what the name is but it comes in bunches and you can buy them in Chinatown’s…with red sticks holding the incense together. It reminds me of my many visits to North East Asian temples.“Prasad Incense”. This is any incense that has been gifted to me by monks off Shrines where people have worhsipped and offered to the gods. After the evening winds down these offerings are taken off the shrines by resident monks and passed out to people.

9). Have you visited any other Buddhist and other religious holy sites? Which ones and what did you think of them?

Too many to name! Haien-sa, Korea. The location that has over 10,000 tablets of wood encompassing the entire Pali Canon! Borobodur, Indonesia. The largest Buddhist complex in the world, it is a representation of Buddha’s life from birth to Nirvana and requires the devotee to walk clockwise around the complex and once a full round is done you walk up to the next level and repeat until you make it to the 9th “floor”.“Vulture’s Peak” near Hangzhou, China where caves are carved out into images of the Buddha. AMAZING!
(Above: Brian at "Vulture's Peak" near Hangzhou, China).

10). What do you think of the spread, growth and adaptation of Buddhism in the West?

In the consumer culture of the West some people become jaded believing that Buddhism has been “marketed” but in the end the image of a divine being is the best for a society. Simply having an image of the Buddha in your home or work space creates a tranquil and peaceful state of mind.

There have been some people who have “jumped on the band wagon” because of Buddhism popularity. But only the true at heart will live through this popularity and show the way, leading by example. Buddhism has created a present culture or mindful citizens and compassionate beings and it is a matter of time before our society as a whole benefits from the actions of these beings.

I always tell people that you have to believe the West is becoming a more conscious and connected culture when someone can make a living being a mala maker.
(Above: Gazebo in a lake. Hangzhou, China).

James: I think you would agree that Brian is a very fascinating, kind, talented and wise person. Thank you Brian for the interview. Once again I would like to recommend Brian's malas. They are the best malas that I have ever used/worn and I have worn many. If you would like to learn more about his malas then just check out his website by clicking on the name, Destination Om: Custom Malas and Prayer Tools.

~Peace to all beings~

PHOTO CREDITS: All photos are the sole property of Brian McIntyre. The image on the top left of the blog is credited to Brian's website: Destination Om: Custom Malas and Prayer Tools.

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