Adapting to Rising Heat.

This post started as a comment in regards to Genkaku's post about the current heat wave on the East coast of America. Thanks Genkaku for the inspiration:

The Earth is our only home but for too long humans have forgotten our close interdependent relationship with her, which has led us to neglect the relationship and abuse her. Yet as we know well from studying the Dharma, we can not hurt the environment without hurting ourselves. We can ignore science all we want but the reality is that it's been getting warmer and warmer at a faster pace than prior warming periods. Direct observations have linked it to fossil fuel use. Seeing how corrosive factory and car pollution is to the human body I will trust science when they conclude that it's changing our climate adversely. Schooling has a funny way of doing that. Science has been right in countless ways because it is based on direct observations and experiments, which incidentally is not entirely unlike the Dharma's teachings of awareness and mindfulness.

This isn't a political issue because we all physically and emotionally suffer when our environment is degraded but besides that it affects the only home we are lucky to enjoy. Regardless of how we got to this point of a warming climate, I think our society needs to adapt to nature better and follow the rest of the world that take siestas (afternoon naps) during the hottest parts of the day. Let nature do it's thing and not fight it. We should take the opportunity to rest and take a nap. What a novel idea!! When I lived in West Africa the whole place would nearly completely shut down between the hours of noon and 2pm. It's only two hours but many Americans would see that as lost productivity, and that unwillingness to accept limitations causes a lot of suffering. Both physically and mentally. It's not being lazy as the American, Puritan work ethic would suggest. It's being aware of our limitations and being fully accepting of the present moment.

I think we push the human body in our modern society too much. We have delusions about what the human body can take and how far we can push it but the human body is perfectly aware of the moment and it's capacities. Whether we accept those limitations or not the body will shut down when the present moment finds it unable to function. Our mind might ignore the present moment but our bodies are finely tuned to it.

Perhaps we can learn from that and accept our limitations instead of forcing and pushing everything. In today's western world (I can't speak for elsewhere) we're over-worked, get less sleep and eat bad food in an impossible chase to "save time" and stay one step ahead in this fast paced world. And I can't help but wonder if that's partly why there's been such an increase in anger, hatred and selfishness. So I say we slow down a bit and bring about noon siesta time here to America.

PHOTO CREDIT: Napping monk by Brian Keathley on Flickr.

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Reviewing "Not in God's Name" by Paula Fouce.

India. The cradle of Eastern spirituality (if not the capital of world religion) is where the documentary, Not in God's Name begins. And the nourishment of that spiritual child is the Ganges river. The beginning scenes on this mystical and legendary body of water are stunning in color, lighting and scope. Truly the imagery evokes sensations of viewing a unique and sacred place.

However, we are also reminded in these initial moments of the dark side of religion--hatred and violence. We are guided through this mine field by the Paula Fouce who spent many years traveling the subcontinent. She saw the best and worst in religion.

Including militant Sikhs who sought to secede from India but were violently expelled from their sacred shrine, which mixed two traditionally explosive ideologies together--religion and politics. In the aftermath many dead Sikhs and soldiers littered the streets and even the Prime Minister Indira Gandhi became a casualty of this clash.

She was assassinated for ordering the raid. As Indira Gandhi was a Hindu, her assassination pitted radicals of the two great religions of Hindiusm and Sikhism against each other. Religions that at their heart are supposed to be about peace and acceptance. I was moved by the images and in one particular quote by Blaise Pascal:

"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious convictions."

The Dalai lama is interviewed for this documentary and he reminds us that the aim of most religions is to provide inner peace. In addition, he admonished us that there need not be one religion, and that they exist because of the various types of personalities upon this planet. In part I would suggest based on our different and varied karma.

The film goes on to spotlight the main religions of India (Hinduism, Islam, Sikhism, Buddhism, Jainism) and how they have influenced the culture to create such a unique place in the spiritual world. Hindu sages and Muslim Imams speak about tolerance in the movie yet we are reminded as well that the two religions have often violently clashed. The movie made me think that unfortunately many adherents become blinded by pride and in doing so pervert their faith into a cause that succeeds only by the downfall of the faithful in other religions. This has often taken the form of violent clashes over disputed holy sites in a deluded clinging to the outward, physical representations of their faith. Sadly many see holy sites as able to provide some sort of outward infusion of spirituality into their inner lives. And while they can be helpful, clinging to them and fighting over them is not just counter to teachings of these great religions but violations of human dignity.

The Buddhist part was short but good and I especially liked the quote the great non-violent Ashoka would said that if you denigrate one religion who denigrate yourself. I also really liked how the narrator spoke of the Dalai Lama as not only being a symbol of political and religious freedom to Tibetans but to all people of the world.

My only complaint about this documentary was that the time line and narrative 0often jumped around a bit but yet the message was never diluted or lost because of that editing.

Not in God's Name is a testament and a potent, timely reminder of just how quickly religions can become the opposite of helping mankind evolve toward a more harmonious life and society. Overall I would suggest this documentary to anyone looking to better understand the many religions of India and how they interact. Another reason to see this film is that it is in the running for an Emmy award nomination in the Non-Fiction Special Category. The Los Angeles Times listed it as a front runner.

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Mencegah Baterai Laptop, Handphone Drop

Sebenarnya sebelum saya menuliskan artikel ini saya sendiri sudah kena juga karena laptop saya sekarang hanya bisa bertahan 1800 detik alias 30 menit. Meski sebelumnya saya sudah tau tipsnya tapi kadang "Males" itu datang meski hanya melepas koneksi listrik saja ogah..akhirnya begini jadinya.



Baterai laptop maupun handphone (hp) sama-saja dalam penggunaannya, apabila sering digunakan maka

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The Cure.

Just like a fever breaks, last night I felt a deep and rejuvenating release from the rising waters that had crested yesterday with my, "discouraged" post. It isn't the "cure" of liberation from the cycle of suffering and rebirth but rather a break in the fever that is discouragement. Writing out my emotions has long helped me process the disorienting thoughts that ensnares all of our minds. It is a form of honesty, which is a trait that I've been blessed and cursed with. Blessed in the sense that it helps me dissect confusing emotions with direct and exacting examination but cursed only in the sense that such honesty means facing sometimes painful and uncomfortable realities. Yet, despite the discomfort it seems to be one of the most direct and effective ways of dealing with obstacles and discouragement.

This release was initiated with my honest writings yesterday, and the sympathetic comments helped me let go of my guilt that somehow I was "failing" as a Buddhist. Intuitively I knew this deep within the recesses of my mind but hearing it from outside yourself always seems to help convince you that what you suspected is in fact reality, and not just your mind tricking you yet again with another delusion.

So, last night lying in bed I had the most unconventional yet therapuetic meditation. Lying in bed I embraced the exhaustion of the day and just enjoyed the feeling of my tired body being cradled by our cloud-like bed. The soft, soothing, rhythmic breathing of my wife cuddled against me brought me a deep sense of calm. Being fully present in the moment I was aware of my own chest rising and falling with deep, natural breaths. Absorbing the feeling as the boundaries and limits between my body and my immediate surroundings blended into the music of the band, "The Cure." Thus, the title of the post.

Feeling limitless yet grounded at the same time--like the sky stretching from horizon to horizon, free to flow yet held from disappearing into outer space by the grounding power of gravity. As I floated about in this state of pure awareness I soon drifted off in a deep restful sleep. Today I awoke feeling like a huge weight was lifted from my mind. A new day has dawned and yet I am thankful for the reminder lesson I was given in my months of struggle. As they say, "It's always darkness before the dawn" and yesterday was that darkest water mark before it crested and ebbed to make way for pure, stabilizing balance that comes from a deep grounding of oneness.

~Peace to all beings~

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Discouraged.

***WARNING: LONG Rant ahead that's not your typical "Kittens and flowers" Buddhist post***

I'm struggling lately in my Dharma practice. I haven't meditated in months--not because I don't want to because I do, but I just can't get myself to do it. A large part of it is my mental illness that makes finding motivation extra challenging. Especially when the heavy medicating drugs I have to take to prevent mania and psychotic episodes zap me further of the will to do much of anything. It's difficult to fully convey how difficult it is to over-come.

Furthermore, I deal with a constant level of depression just beneath the surface of even my best days where I feel fairly decent. And please don't say, "Everyone gets depressed" because deep, clinical depression isn't like just having a bad day. Irregardless of that it's just an insensitive thing to say to someone who is living with clinical depression. It's chronic and biologically based on chemical imbalances in the brain.

And it's not as easy as just taking a pill because I already do, and still there is this underlying level of feeling like life isn't worth it. People think just because there are medications that they are cures--they help take the corners off the sharpest symptoms but they don't "cure" you in the sense that they don't bring you to the level of those who don't live with a severe mental illness.

Ironically, I was attracted in part to Buddhism because of it's psychological benefits, and I still believe it has immense help for those dealing with mental illness. However, Buddhism is difficult for anyone let alone for people with mental health challenges (unless you're enlightened, and how many can honestly claim that?). And it seems that the more I think I know about Buddhism the less I actually do. Everyone loves that "honeymoon phase" when you first taste the Dharma and it literally changes the way you see the world for the better but then the nitty-gritty, hard work begins and at times you stop and ask yourself, "Is this really worth it?"

It is. Buddhism can be a real bitch, and sometimes I wish I could just adhere to a religion where blind faith was about all I needed to do. However, I have felt those fleeting moments of enlightenment too profoundly to abandon the Dharma. I'm just discouraged about how poor my practice is right now, and has been for some time. An aspect of this discouragement stems from a lot of anger that I struggle with on a daily basis, which is, in part, again, rooted in the schizoaffective disorder.

I have Attention Deficit Disorder (or, A.D.D.) in conjunction with the affective side of things (affective simply means mood disorder, or bipolar. So, schizoaffective disorder is a combination of some schizophrenic symptoms and some bipolar symptoms). A.D.D. is a condition, which (in part) prevents the brain from being able to screen out stimuli that most people can relegate to the background.

So, while I am also hearing and listening to you talking to me, I can also hear at the same time: birds chirping outside, the kids screaming in their yard as they play, the traffic noise, the humming of the refrigerator and other appliances, the lawn mower going in the distance, etc. and I can't screen it out to focus simply on the conversation. All of this noise at once raises the stress in my mind and makes me impatient with the inability to focus on just one sound, which often makes me angry. In addition, I am hyper-aware of what is going on in the world and I get so angry because I just see humanity (and especially here in America) doing everything it can to destroy itself, its environment, its economy, its political system of democracy, its compassion for those who need assistance, its decency toward others in public places, its health care system, its acceptance of minorities and those of different sexual orientation, and on and on.

It makes me wonder what's the point of doing anything?!! Why participate in society and voting when it doesn't seem to make a difference or matter. What is the difference between letting karma do it's thing and predestination because some Buddhists seem to just shrug their shoulders in the face of struggles as if to say, "Eh, it's just karma doing its thing--what's the point?" And, yes, I know that suffering is inevitable and everywhere. I know that the world is not the place to look for stability. However, it seems that in response, many Buddhists take the default position to disconnect from society and disregard politics.

Yet, I struggle with this solution because it seems rather fatalistic, nihilistic and a form of avoidance. It seems to me that we owe it to ourselves to try and do our best to make it a better world--even if it can never be perfect. Aren't we making things worse if we just disconnect from society? Don't we have a duty to try our best to help build a better society? What if everyone just disregarded politics and civic responsibilities? Isn't it a bit selfish in a way? If no one tried to maintain some sort level of a stable world then it seems to me that some dictator would just take advantage of that and wipe out whole sections of the globe. Isn't that basically just letting suffering multiply? It's one thing to realize that suffering on some level is inevitable. However, to just disconnect seems to ironically cause more suffering from less and less good-hearted people participating to crafting how a country's general society behaves.

I'm certainly not giving up on Buddhism by any stretch but I'm discouraged today and it has been building. I guess my discouragement is with a lot of things but my Buddhist practice has me a bit frustrated, dispirited and depressed. I know it's not Buddhism that is the problem, and I know that I have a lot of work to do but please don't just post simplistic comments saying things like, "All you have to do is 'A' or 'B.'" Or, "You're problem is 'X.'"Everyone is full of advise but it's all easier said than done.

I'm not necessarily looking for answers, or advice--just some sympathy and assurance that I'm not the only one with these discouragements. I mean, intuitively I know that I'm not the only one but the things I hear sometimes from my fellow Buddhists makes me feel like I missed out on some meeting where everyone gained enlightenment. I'm not any kind of expert and I've got plenty of rust around the edges but I am always skeptical of people who seem to think they have it all figured out and that they're going to set everyone straight on how to be like them.

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